Stop Working On Your Relationship, It Doesn't Work!

15.08.2012 11:38

Are you tired of working on your relationship (even if you don't have one)?

Do you find it frustrating to figure out just how to make everything work so that you can finally feel met and fully expressed?

Then you need to immediately stop working on your relationship!

It doesn't work!

In fact, the more you try and fix it, understand it, and heaven forbid, workshop it, the worse it gets... why?

Our relationship with another person is very much alive. Consider it like a resonant field between the two of you.

The health of your relational field depends utterly on what both of you bring to it.

If you bring to it your feelings of lack, your frustrations, your fears, then what do you think happens to this vibrant-yet-delicate field?

It starts to lose its shine.

It starts to die.

But it also can resurrect itself.

Here are 3 tips to bring your relationship back to life:

1) Stopping being the beggar. Discover what you love, cultivate more of that, and give it freely & abundantly.

2) Stop trying to fix it, it ain't broken! If your relationship isn't quite what you want it to be, it doesn't mean that there's something wrong with it.

In fact it may be an invitation to learn something about yourself.

Relationship are evolution accelerators (if we are willing to learn & grow from them).

3) Try playing. Being playful isn't silly, it's VITAL! You already have workshops to develop yourself, work to contribute to, etc

See if you can make your relationship a sacred ground for conscious play. One where you are together not for what you can get, but for what you can celebrate together.

BONUS practice: Approach your partner like it is both the first and the last time you will ever connect with them and see what happens.

And tell me about it!

(For singles, this is an important muscle to develop prior to intimate relationship, so consider this your invitation to be more playful with those in your life now).

Celebrating your aliveness,

Saida